Today, I’d like to cover something that's been on my mind recently - the importance of the type of people we surround ourselves with in life. It's been said before, and I truly believe:
"Happiness is less about what you do and more about who you do it with"
Think about some of the best moments in your life. What made them great? Was it the activity itself that made them memorable or was it the people who experienced them alongside you? While the events were special, most times, the people you were with were what truly made these moments stand out.
Now think of some of the worst moments in your life. The difficulty you faced came with its own set of challenges, but the pain you experienced was probably multiplied if you had the wrong people surrounding you at the time.
One Bad Apple
You may have heard the saying, "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with." And while it may sound cliché, I have to admit, there's some truth to it. When we surround ourselves with positive, supportive, and fun-loving people, we tend to feel happier and more fulfilled. On the other hand, if we surround ourselves with negative or unsupportive people, we may find ourselves feeling drained or unhappy in situations where we would otherwise be having a great time.
Think about it - have you ever been in an unhealthy friendship or relationship? You probably found yourself feeling weary, unmotivated, and even questioning your own worth. On the other hand, when we surround ourselves with positive, uplifting people, we tend to feel more energized, motivated, and satisfied.
It's not just about surrounding ourselves with successful people either. The quality of a relationship is more important than its status. Someone who supports you, encourages you, and makes you feel valued is worth more to you than someone who has achieved a certain level of success, but doesn't care about your well-being. Your self-worth is not for sale and money, status, or notoriety does not define a person’s worth or the quality of a relationship.
And it's not just about friends or romantic partners, either. The same goes for family members and colleagues. We spend a significant amount of time with these people, and they have the power to influence us just as much as anyone else for good or bad.
An Honest Look
Of course, I’m not saying what we do in life doesn't matter - it certainly does. But without meaningful relationships and connections, our achievements and successes can feel empty and unfulfilling. All the prosperity in the world means nothing if you have no real friends and family to share it with. The “wins” become bitter pills that ultimately poison your life instead of enhancing it.
I believe Smokey Robinson said it best in the iconic song, “Tears of a Clown”;
“Now, there's some sad things known to man
But ain't too much sadder than the tears of a clown
When there's no one around”
Shallow, unfulfilling, or abusive relationships leave no room for honest communication and authentic care. Instead, they require you to constantly smooth over problems and “go along to get along”. Portraying false narratives of a “happy” life on social media while living in turmoil behind the scenes has become the new norm in too many people’s lives. You owe it to yourself to take a step back and evaluate every relationship you hold dear. You then have to be brutally honest with yourself about what those relationships give to, (and require from), you. At that point, you have decisions to make concerning whether they should remain. In the end, your life is the sum of your circle.
It's also important to note that the people we surround ourselves with can have a huge impact on our personal growth. When we spend time with others who inspire us, challenge us, and encourage us to be our best selves, we are more likely to reach higher and achieve greater things. Our relationships shape us, influence our decisions and impact our growth. They either lift us up or bring us down.
Choose Wisely
So, what does this all mean? It means that we should scrutinize and prioritize the relationships in our lives. We should cultivate and nurture positive interactions with those that provide mutual care, as they can make life more fulfilling. It also means that we should distance ourselves from those that continually bring strife and unrest.
The temporary loss we may feel is nothing compared to the peace of mind
you will experience without the constant hum of negative energy.
In conclusion, remember what you do is less important than who you do it with. Surround yourself with people who bring love, encouragement, support, and positivity into your life and you'll find that life just becomes better.
In Part 2 of this blog we will look at practical ways to distance ourselves from negative and unhealthy relationships as you focus on being the best version of you.
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